Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Is Oprah even human
Randomize
