Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
We need to get me chipped asap
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
