I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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