My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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