TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
