brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
