i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
