Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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