But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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