Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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