I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
