Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
