why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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