i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
that's an acceptable place to lick
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
