glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Randomize
