His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I just found puke in my bra..
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
