So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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