It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
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