Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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