Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
