White coat. Heels.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
