That's when you crack a 10am beer
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
