we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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