no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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