turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
