Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
