We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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