he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
