somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
My ATM looks so different sober.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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