he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
she pinky promised me she was 18
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
