why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
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