You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
