Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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