Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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