you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
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