I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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