Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
