i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
