im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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