seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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