what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Randomize
