I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
