If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
