i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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