I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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