i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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