Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
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