I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
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