if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
