I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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